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heirs
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Name: Tze Hoong
Country: United States
Metro: Wichita
Birthday: 8/9/1983
Gender: Male
Interests: music, cars, philosophy, serenity of an acoustic guitar's rhythm, a good supper at Quiktrip...
Expertise: Think... (i can't miss this one out!), music, your life problems-my ears, staring at you until you get scared
Occupation: Student
Industry: Business
Message: message meEmail: email me
MSN: heirs@hotmail.com
Yahoo:  tzehoongtan@yahoo.com
Member Since:
1/14/2004
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| I really cannot deny how much God is trying to reach out to me. In my midst of troubles, and worries I am easily put into the spot to find my heart breaking down before Him...
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| Dc talk wrote...
"...remember the deepest seeds still finds the light of day..."
It is God's design, it is how He made it to be. When you have His spirit inside of you, you will know His heart. As far as a seed is buried deep in the ground, its purpose is to grow towards light. It sense sunlight when the sun shines, it knows where to go.
I was hit with news about God and in my heart fled with tears, I cannot hold back the truth that I know about God and the things that I have so very ignored and forgotten. As those words came into my ears and into my heart, I was filled with how much God is real and I knew so very well that my spirit longs to burst into joy and worship. Despite how may be blinded to many distractions in front of me, but when God's words come by, I cannot deny His power and that it brings me to my lowest...
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| The streets are filled with leaves...
Now through the midst of fall, the landscape reminds me of things that would happen as the weather gets colder. I start bringing out thicker wears, I start to prepare for different events to take place. And I am reminded of Christmas that is around the corner.
I could still remember a year ago when I got to go home. I could still feel and smell the air of home. Time has passed all too quickly and I don't know what have I done that is worth all these 10 months or so. I managed to finish a personal project that I am happy about, I manage to find myself in a point of humility that I really needed, I manage to find doors open for opportunities of self improvement. But I don't know if I have done anything worthy for God.
Over a year ago, I was really broken down in the midst of some people and now it is the other way around... I am wondering if God is telling me something. But I do know that such a experience is not something to be put to waste and I am waiting for God to lead me to do something about it.
I hope that seen or unseen, that I have done what I needed to do this year. I know that I will never get to fulfill everything that God wants me to do, seeing how pathetic I can be some times, I know I am far from the goal. I hope I have put effort into drawing myself closer to the edge of His will. The renewal of my mind is never such a big change since a few years back. But all in all, God places many things this year to turn me around.
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| Lest we forget who we are and what we are capable of, we will not survive.
I am reminded again and again that I need to look to God for everything. Even as I entrust people around me for big tasks, my foremost criteria is someone who depends on God, and skills comes next. But I think I kind of went the other direction to put skills first. My dependence on God fluctuates so much that I become a hypocrite. My confidence thus fluctuates with this very issue, as I make decisions that sometimes don't make sense.
Yesterday I was reminded by something of my need for God because I was confronted with something that I could not understand and could not work out. Then I fell into a place of anxiety and worry, and helplessness filled my heart. I have no idea how are things to work out, in ways that I do not want to work to gain the world and abandoning my soul for eternity.
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| I felt an urge to write, I don't know why.
At an instant, I felt the world in my head. I just finished watching a sci-fi series and listen to some songs. I filled my 2 hours with things ranging from different specs in life. And this leads me to conclude that our world is really complicated. Leave alone science alone, but the complexity of the heart and mind.
Everyone in the world is trying to find a place for themselves, or trying to live a legacy for something, or taking the best they can get from the diversity before them. We have specialists... or jack of all trades but master of none. We have geniuses of academia but with the lack of understanding of simplicity of life. We have and extreme of one side, we have people in the middle who cannot comprehend either sides.
The world is too big, and no one can grasp it all. Even as man determines to conquer everything, something new comes up. The universe is beyond what we can still measure. Let alone, the world has more for us to discover.
My God is too BIG... yet resides in my heart!
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